Clomid, a Cold, & a Funeral

The night  of the 18th, right after my last post about my long cycles and things taking forever, I got my period. Haha isn’t that always the way? 😛 So I proved myself wrong and was able to start Clomid last Saturday, CD 5 while it still being September! I took my last pill of Clomid this past Wednesday on CD 10 and have started my OPKs the day after, which was yesterday. It was negative, obviously.  Hopefully if all goes right in the world, I will ovulate sometime next week, the first week of October! Although to be honest, and I guess I am being a Debbie Downer, but I don’t feel like this first round will work. Not with my low dose of Metformin. I really hope I am proven wrong though, because I do not want to up my Metformin dosage. I will if I have to but I know it is going to be rough and I’ll have major anxiety about leaving my house…

This past weekend was extremely busy. It started with Adeline and I driving to my parents house after work last Thursday night to be a few hours closer to the National Cemetery where AC’s grandfather would be buried the following day. AC wasn’t able to attend, if you can believe it! He got called on to do 2 weeks of Army duty to help them wrap up the fiscal year and would not let him take off that Friday for his grandfather’s funeral! Which he was being buried with full honors and a 21 gun salute, I might add! As he was a high ranked Colonel. But I guess that is life in the Military, you are going to miss birthdays, holidays, funerals, even in the Reserves. It was a beautiful funeral that honored his grandfather. Adeline was mostly behaved, as I kept feeding her yogurt melts to keep her occupied during the service.

 

Once at the burial site, Adeline was pretty squirmy, wanting to walk around and play in the grass. But it was drizzling and very muddy. I was surprised when they did the gun salute that the loud bang didn’t scare her one bit!  She passed out shortly after the funeral was over and then we made the hour drive back to my parent’s house.

Just after midnight I was woken up to Adeline coughing pretty badly and she was kind of wheezing and felt warm. I was instantly awake! I ran her to the bathroom and turned on the shower to the hottest it would go because I have heard the steam helps with bad congestion. Well after maybe 15 min of that, she threw up, which freaked me out so I turned the shower off and ran up to my parents bedroom and started banging on the door to wake up my mom. (I had some serious flashbacks doing that lol) Once my mom finally woke up, I had her get a thermometer and told her what was going on. Adeline had a 102 fever so I made a mad dash to Walmart at 2am while my mom stayed with Adeline. I grabbed Tylenol and a Nose Frieda, and some baby vapor rub for her chest. Thankfully after all of that was administered she was sounding and looking better or I would have been making a trip to the ER. After that night I have been keeping Adeline on a strict Tylenol regiment that kept her feeling her normal self all weekend. Then on Monday she wasn’t doing so hot again so Tuesday I took her to the doctors along with my MIL. The doctor said she has a cold but it is a lot worse for her because she is a preemie. He gave her a 10 min nebulizer breathing treatment that he could immediately hear the difference in her lungs afterwards thankfully. We were sent home with an inhaler to be

used for at least 3 days, which will get us through to the weekend. I am hopeful she will be completely better by Monday.

• My dad and Adeline watching Daniel Tiger ❤  —->

Not Yet

Sorry, I just realized I missed an entire month of posting. I was super optimistic in my last post saying I’d be on Clomid again in September…clearly I didn’t factor in how long and drawn out all of my cycles are. Ugh. I started my progesterone on cd33 Sept. 10th, I was supposed to wait until cd35 but I couldn’t wait. I finished my 5 days of it on Friday the 14th, cd 37 and here it is Tuesday the 18th, cd41 and I am still waiting for Aunt Flo. I hope it comes today so I can get this show on the road and see if Clomid will work for me this time around now that I am back on Metformin.

Although there is a catch, I am taking a lower dose of Metformin right now. Only 1 pill at night. When I actually got pregnant with Adeline I was on 3 pills of Metformin, 2 at night and 1 in the morning. Since it upset my stomach so bad and it was just a nightmare for awhile, Dr. C thought at most I’ll up it to 2 pills this go around. Or stay at 1 pill if 2 makes me sick. But she said there was no guarantee that only 1 pill would be enough to do anything for me… so yes, I should be taking 2 pills of Metformin already but I am so fearful that I’ve decided for this 1st round to test how my body is responding to just the 1 pill +myo-inistol. If I don’t ovulate again I’ll begrudgingly start taking 2 of the Metformin and just try to suck it up.

In more cheerful news, Adeline has said her first word last month at 14 months, “No”. Hahaha 😀 oh the joys of hearing her shout No at us all the time now. Her little voice is really cute though! And now at 15 months, she finally has her 1st top tooth coming in! Well actually one has broken the gums and there is another about to. So 3 teeth officially at 15 months, says No, I just bumped her to size 3 diapers, and she is very very close to walking. She loves to hold our hands and walk around right now. I am guessing she is 16 lbs now and still in size 6 month clothes but her head is getting too big for some of them so I might start transitioning her to 9 month clothes shortly. She is just the happiest baby, I love her so much ❤

Hello Metformin, My Old Friend

I just got back from my annual gyn appointment where Dr. C got right down to business on my infertility struggles. I was so happy she knew right away why I was really there and didn’t have to bring it up. She unfortunately has no idea about myo-inositol supplements and wants me to start back on Metformin instead 😦 😦 😦 I just can’t get away from this drug. My new plan of action is to immediately start Progesterone to end this current cycle and start a new one finally and pair it with Metformin. I am going to take 2 pills of Metformin at night after taking 1 the first week in hopes that my stomach will be adjust ok… Dr. C said this cycle is basically going to be a wash because I can’t start Clomid again until September so that the Metformin will be really in my system by then. But I am still happy she is giving me 3 more rounds of Clomid so that I won’t have to go to the specialist until December now. I am calling this a win even though it involves Metformin.

Surgery Day

The last Saturday in June was spent going to a 1st Birthday Pool Party for one of our friends baby. This will be the 3rd baby in our friend group to turn one years old and 3 more to go! Adeline loves the water, so she had a great time splashing around with all of the other babies. I was so glad that this was before her surgery too or she wouldn’t have been able to enjoy the pool. Right after this fun weekend was Adeline’s hernia surgery on Monday, July 2nd.

Her surgery almost didn’t happen though. While I was at work on Friday at 3:40 pm I got a call from the hospital that was going to be doing Adeline’s surgery only to be told by their finance person Regina, that our insurance was showing up as inactive in their system! Of course I am then panicking and told her we definitely have insurance and that I would call them right away and get everything figured out. She said that was fine and that she would call me back at the end of her shift to ensure everything was worked out. After I hung up with her I immediately contacted AC and told him the situation and told him to call Tricare. Not 10 min later I get another call from a different nurse telling me Regina had already left for the day and that my baby’s surgery was cancelled! I could not believe it! She needs this surgery and if we couldn’t get this date we wouldn’t be able to get her in until August and that could put Adeline’s health at risk if her hernia’s got any worse. This woman showed zero compassion, I was stunned. After I told AC what had happened, he immediately called the hospital back only to get their voicemail saying they were closed for the day and wouldn’t be opened until Monday. Her surgery was on Monday at 8am! After leaving voicemails all weekend in desperation we decided to just show up at her 6:30 am time-slot in hopes that they would still let us fill out the paperwork and let her have her surgery at 8am. Thankfully Regina is incompetent and didn’t notifiy anyone else that Adeline’s surgery was cancelled so we were able to get all of the paperwork done and checked Adeline in and then were taken into a room in the back to prep her for surgery. It was then that we were told our insurance was still showing up as inactive even though AC called them on friday and they had assured us everything was fixed. AC had to leave the room and go call Tricare again, there was so much back and forth and frustration all while nurses and surgeons and the anesthesia person came in and continued to get Adeline ready in hopes that things would work out. All of those people were amazing and so hopeful! It was a huge blessing, unlike the unfriendly people in the front that AC was dealing with. And of course  Regina was there, complaining loudly about how we showed up even though

she cancelled my baby’s surgery. Finally around 8:30 am everything was back in order and straightened out with our insurance. They had to let the person who was scheduled after us to go before us but we weren’t complaining, just happy Adeline was getting the surgery she needed.

She was taken back at 11:17 am. Surgery went smoothly and she was back in the recovery room drinking apple juice by 3 pm. She was very sleepy the rest of the day and a little sore but over all she was doing very great! She got dissolvable stitches on both sides of her stomach that are covered with bandages so I have no idea what they even look like yet. But the doctor had assured me her scars would be tiny. I am so thankful her surgery is over and she is back to her normal self.

TTC: I spoke with my doctor last week and she said since Clomid didn’t work for me I will have to go see an RE specialist now. It is out of her hands. Ughhh. So I have been doing my research and with my last ditch effort I am going to try some supplements that have amazing reviews for restoring ovulation and regulating cycles for women with PCOS. I will give in until September or so then reluctantly head to the RE.

A Busy June and Clomid Fail

Every single weekend this June, Adeline and I have been on the go. The first weekend we traveled up north to my parents house to celebrate my sister’s 29th birthday! Since her birthday is on the 3rd and Adeline’s is the 5th my sister wanted to have a little joint family birthday together. It was just my parents, sister, Adeline, my grandpa and I since a lot of people couldn’t come, including AC who had a lot of projects to work on around the house. It was really nice though. We had cake and a cookout and opened gifts. The following weekend, June 9th was Adeline’s actual 1st birthday party with all of our friends. Most of them actually all have babies born in 2017 like Adeline so there was about 5 babies in attendance! I feel like I failed a little bit at her 1st birthday party, the location we chose was an hour away from the house to make it convenient for everyone else but we then got stuck in a ton of traffic and ended up arriving to the location at the same time as all of the guests rather than a few hours early to set up decorations! I was so disappointed about that but with the help of some of the early arrivers we did manage to set up the picnic tables and lay the food and treats out. It just wasn’t as decorated as I imagined it would be. But overall I guess things mostly worked out, AC grilled burgers for everyone and I had baked a huge chocolate cake with peanut butter frosting (that’s Adeline’s favorite) and we opened gifts. So all in all I guess it was a success anyway.  That Tuesday Adeline had to get her 12 month shots, which there were 4 of them! Poor baby. AC took her to that appointment so I didn’t have to witness that torture thankfully. He said she was a champ though and only cried a little bit. My mother in law watched her after that so she would not have to go back to daycare in case she started feeling bad, which luckily didn’t happen.

Then the weekend of the 16th Adeline and I made the 4 hour road trip to Smith Mountain Lake! My best friend’s parents retired there and have the most gorgeous lake house. I wish I could retire like that some day. Their house is huge and amazing, Adeline and I got our own bedroom with a king sized bed and our own private bathroom. So nice! We spend the weekend splashing around in the lake and sun bathing. Adeline actually was ok with being in the water, she didn’t seem thrilled but didn’t hate it either.

She wasn’t a fan of the huge life jacket she had to wear however, ha!

This past weekend was my mom’s 60th birthday so Adeline and I traveled back up to my parent’s house to help celebrate. AC couldn’t make it, as it was his drill weekend with the Army. My Aunt from NY flew in for the big event and a lot of other family and friends came to celebrate too, it was a full house! Adeline got to play with both of her cousins, who are 6 and 3 years old.

Aside from all of the fun weekend adventures, I had finished my 3rd cycle of Clomid and have been waiting to ovulate. Well, it’s cd 31 and nothing. I guess Clomid isn’t going to be the miracle it was for me last time that brought me Adeline. Although I was on Metformin paired with it last time and maybe that is the difference. I just couldn’t bring myself to go back on it this time and maybe that was a mistake. It upset my stomach so badly and I felt sick all the time and was afraid to eat anything. I really dreaded being on it. I am going to call my doctor tomorrow and see what my next steps will be, though I am pretty sure it will be to go to the specialist again. Ugh, I don’t have money for that. I am debating trying Plexus for a month or 2 to see if it can help my hormonal imbalance and maybe get me to ovulate? Not sure it’s a miracle drink like that but one of my friends who has unexplained infertility is trying it in hopes that she will have a 2nd baby as well. Have any of you ever heard of it or tried it? It was originally for diabetics but people with pcos have similarities with blood sugar issues. I think it’s around $80 for a months supply though, which is pricey so I don’t know. It would be cheaper than the specialist if it worked though…

Oh also, Adeline’s surgery is scheduled for next week, please pray that it goes smoothly and she comes out better than ever! We are all really nervous.

Happy 1st Birthday!

Today is Adeline’s very 1st Birthday! And I just can’t believe she has been in this world for a whole year. She started out at just 2 lbs 9 oz having been born at 29 weeks. She stayed in the NICU for 2 months before we were able to finally bring her home and start living life with her 24/7. I am so beyond blessed that AC and I have this little bundle of joy in our lives. She makes every day better!

Today she is 14 lbs and wearing 6 month clothes and size 2 diapers. Developmentally she is supposed to be at 9 and a half months adjusted but really I think she is almost on track as much as any other 1 year old, minus her tiny stature. She is always always smiling and happy, rarely ever cries, even her daycare teachers agree that she is one very laid back little baby. Although she is going through a phase were she fusses if I leave a room without taking her with me or if I try to let anyone else hold her. It’s flattering to me, but I enjoy friends and family getting to hold her and bond with her too. She is also sleeping through the night most of the time, has 2 bottom teeth and is cruising around the furniture. No first words yet but she babbles up a storm. It’s funny that she has more hair in her NICU pictures than she has now! Her hair is very slow growing.

This Saturday we will be throwing her a Birthday Party with all of our friends and family. I will post pictures of it after! It is bumble bee themed, for a Happy 1st Bee Day celebration!

TTC side note, I am on my 3rd round of Clomid now after having taken progesterone. Tonight is my 5th pill of Clomid starting from cd5. Side effects: a few hot flashes and I can feel myself getting the crazies on and off. Poor AC 😛 I hope this round works. Come on, Adeline needs a sibling! 😀

11 Months

Adeline is officially 11 months old as of Saturday and now less than a month away from turning one years old! She is growing leaps and bounds these days and can do so much. She can sit by herself and only falls over occasionally, she can pull herself up to standing position from sitting position, and she is crawling and climbing all over everything and everyone these days! She has still just the bottom 2 teeth and I don’t see

anymore coming in yet but she likes to stick her tongue to the roof of her mouth so maybe something is going on there. She hasn’t been weighed since last month but I imagine she is still 13 pounds, maybe closer to 14 though.

This weekend we are getting her 1 year photos done to use for her birthday invitations. I think we are going to do a smash cake for the photos and I’m really not sure what she will do with it. I am excited to see! Then next Saturday is AC’s sister’s big wedding ceremony where Adeline is the flower girl. It is going to be a very busy month that is going to fly by with all of the birthday planning and being in a wedding.  Oh and I guess my very 1st Mother’s Day is coming up next Sunday! I am very excited about that. I don’t know what we will do for that yet or if AC is planning anything but I am looking forward to being able to celebrate that this year, as opposed to last year when we were in the middle of a year long struggle with my pcos and trying to get pregnant, we finally have our baby. AC really thought we never would, so I am just so overjoyed and blessed to have Adeline in our lives even if she ends up being our only child.

Which brings me to TTC news. I am on CD42 and nothing. I messaged my doctor if I should just let this cycle run its course or if I should be taking progesterone again to not let me get too far off track. We will see what she says. I also asked about a monitored cycle to see how I am responding to the Clomid if I am at all. Dr. C said that all she could really do was bloodwork on cd21 to see if I have ovulated or not yet and that my insurance probably wouldn’t cover it since it is in regards to infertility…I don’t think that is worth doing if that’s the case. I’ll save my money for the specialist, thanks.

Discouraged. Come on Clomid!

Well I am on CD30 and have yet to find ovulation. I think PCOS is kicking my butt this time around and Clomid just might not be the miracle drug it was for me the first time around. Both the 1st and 2nd cycles I have only gotten the flashing smiley on my clearblue OPKs. I have one more shot with Clomid before I will most likely be sent off again to the specialist. I messaged Dr. C if this round could be monitored to see how my body is actually reacting to the Clomid because I am seeing nothing. Hopefully she agrees to do it. It wont be covered by insurance but neither will the specialist, which I am really afraid about. I really thought that this time around would be like my first and Clomid would get me pregnant fast and we’d go on our merry way, so I am feeling pretty down right now. Thankfully I have my best friend in the trenches with me going through her own unexplained infertility struggles at the same time so that we are constantly building each other up each cycle and being the support we both need. She is ahead of me in her journey though as she is already doing IUIs, this will be her 3rd one coming up and I really pray that it will work for her this time! The only tiny shred of hope I can muster for this cycle for me is that I have read that people with pcos can ovulate way late in their cycle and still get pregnant.  So there’s some tiny chance that it could still happen this time?? Although I am not sure if that is true when you are on Clomid. I have always ovulated around cd17 on Clomid so cd30 seems absurd. I don’t know what our next steps will be so I am waiting on Dr. C’s message. One other thing I am wondering is that I was on Metformin combined with Clomid the first time. Maybe Metformin in the missing key this time around? I dread going back on it but maybe I need to. That’s something else I need to speak with Dr. C about.

Easter, 10 Months and Clomid Round 2

Easter this year was spent in Colonial Williamsburg. It has become our tradition every Easter to drive the couple of hours in on the morning of and get brunch with both my parents and AC’s parents and then whatever siblings of ours that are available to make the trip. This year my sister joined us and AC’s sister and her now husband came. AC’s mom was sick with the flu and couldn’t make it and his dad stayed in the DC area to be near his father who had caught the flu and then it went into pneumonia and was the reason for Adam’s sister’s early little wedding ceremony that I posted about on my last blog. He sadly just passed away this Wednesday and we will be going to his viewing on Sunday. He was an amazing man who lived to be 97 and outlived 3 wives!

But back to Easter, we all met up for brunch at a little hole in the wall place and caught up with each other and then walked around CW for awhile. The weather was perfect for once, not too hot or too cold. Some of the flowers had even started to bloom and the sheep were out walking around. Unfortunately Adeline was asleep at this point and missed out on seeing them. She did wake up to see the horse drawn carriages go by though. She was not that impressed, little stinker.

On April 5th Adeline turned 10 months old! No longer in the single digits and dangerously close to 1 years old! I know I keep saying this, but time really does fly by so fast when you have a baby. It’s like you blink and they are grown. She had her very last RSV immunization shot this Tuesday, I am so glad those are done. It is heartbreaking seeing her cry each time. Then yesterday she had her 9 months checkup, I know I am very behind! For some reason I didn’t know she was supposed to get a checkup at 9 months and completely missed the boat until I was told about it when I had brought her in when she was sick. (thankfully she is well now!) Anyway, Adeline is 13 lbs, which puts her, even at her adjusted age of 7 1/2 months developed, in the 2nd percentile for weight and 4th for height. My baby is tiny! I was a bit concerned by this but knew it was coming as she still wears some 3 month clothes and is in size 1 diapers at 10 months old. The doctor said part of it, aside from her being a preemie, was probably genetic. Both AC and I are not tall people. She suggested we start feeding her 3 meals of her baby food a day to see if that helps with her growth though. And to start giving her eggs and peanut butter to try and other things like that.

I am just thankful she didn’t say Adeline was Failure to Thrive because despite her small size, developmentally she is doing amazing and not that far behind a regular 10 month old! We discovered just last night that when holding our hands, she can walk! She is moving her feet along and everything! We were so surprised! She stands on her own if she holds onto something so it’s probably not going to be long before she puts 2 and 2 together and is shuffling around while clinging to the furniture. Another big development this month is that Adeline has her 2 front bottom teeth coming in! They have only just broke the surface but they are out. I am thankful they don’t seem to be causing her any real pain yet either.

In my TTC news, I finished my 5 pills of 50mg of Clomid a week ago and have been testing for ovulation ever since. I took them on CD5 to CD10. I have been getting the flashing smiley face on the ClearBlue OPK tests but not the solid smiley face indicating it’s here yet even though it’s detecting something. I am on CD17 today so it better come this weekend! I only have 3 tests left before I have to go spend $40 on another kit, ugh! I have also been getting pretty bad headaches this time around but thankfully not the Clomid Crazies like last month. I know AC is relieved! 😛 Fingers crossed I ovulate soon. Adeline needs a sibling!

 

Clomid Round 1 Ending and a Wedding

Well this first round back on Clomid was a huge bust. I didn’t even ovulate so there was zero chance of us getting pregnant this time. I read back on my previous blog posts about the very 1st time I started Clomid and the same thing happened then too, no ovulation. So I imagine I just need a few rounds for it to get in my system and work properly. It took 3 cycles last time to get pregnant with Adeline but I am hoping it will work on my 2nd try this time. I guess we will see soon, I just started progesterone again last night on my CD 26. I was going to take it on CD 25 but I was unaware that my doctor did not give me any refills of progesterone, only the Clomid, so I had to wait a day for my pharmacy to reach out to my doctor and get a new prescription faxed over. Hopefully this doesn’t mess anything up, but I don’t think it will.

On a fun note, this past weekend my sister in law had a special little wedding ceremony so that her granddad could be a part of it. Her big wedding is in May, where Adeline will be a flower girl, but her grandad is 97 and not doing so well health wise so to ensure that he would be a part of it, they had this ceremony for him. So sweet. It was very small and intimate, just the immediate family on both sides. And then we all went out to lunch afterwards to celebrate with the newly wed couple. This Saturday is AC’s 32 birthday on St. Patrick’s Day so we are going to a Brewery to celebrate, there better be green beer! Then on Monday Adeline is starting a new daycare. I am very nervous about this as it is a real daycare with 18 kids all in one room ages 5 months to 4 years old. She was only one of 5 kids at her babysitter’s but unfortunately since AC went back to his old job and this babysitter is an hours drive from both of our jobs and just not practical. I hope she adjusts well to this new place and it is a good fit, but I am hesitant about kids of all ages sharing the same space. I don’t want her to get run over or ignored. I will keep you posted!

Random Adeline development: this past weekend Adeline started saying Da da da da, AC was thrilled and then this week she started saying Ma ma ma! I know they aren’t the real words yet, just sounds, but I love it ❤